Monday, April 04, 2005

to my wife

Women.... so the saying goes! I have never understood women. In the past I have never understood why they all run screaming from me. Now, for the life of me, I cannot understand how in the world my wife doesn't. Never really understood to the fullest why she cares so much. Just ask any of my closest friends, I would be a complete disaster with out my wife. I know I am far from the perfect husband, and yes I do tend to instigate from time to time, but she loves me complete and whole in spite of these things. Now I cant say that we are the perfect couple because we are human after all, but the end of the day is just the end of the day, no grudges, no bickering, no "see you in hell", just "good night". If there was a problem from the day before, there is always another day.

To my wife whom I love always, forever, indefinately. The mother of my children, my best friend, the reason I have everything I ever wanted.

Tuesday, March 22, 2005

yes I am still alive

I am still alive, and this post is proof that I havent posted twice then forgot I had a blog. I have been busy the past couple of days, and do not have internet at home ( I know that is sad, but even sadder still is the number of people who read this blog)

Friday, March 18, 2005

day after St. Patricks

I linked to SheepGuardingLlama. This is my buddies blog, he started bloging LONNGGG before it was popular 2001 I think. So somehow I got the Audio Blog to work, I guess you just have to be patient with it. No I am not up at 1AM in the morning posting audio Blogs, I have better things to do with my fat, balding, self. You know like sleep. What are the two most important things for fat Guys? Eating and Sleeping.

10 A little sleep, a little slumber,

a little folding of the hands to rest-

11 and poverty will come on you like a bandit

and scarcity like an armed man

Just had to add in Proverbs 6:10-11(NIV).

So any way my Wife an I are reading the Bible cover to cover. Her mother, stepfather, sister, someone else, and us are in some type of competition to se who can do the best as far as reading a little of the Bible every day. We each have a calendar with specific daily reading tasks (all the same for every person) and for every day we read we each put a quarter dollar in a jar. Each day that we miss we put a half-dollar in a jar. For every day we mark our success and failures and initial. At the end of the year the person who has been the most consistantly successful will get all of the money that every person has collected. Should be intresting, I doubt my wife and I will win, but the important thing is we are reading the Bible. Currently our Old Testement reading is Numbers, we finish Leviticus not to long ago. Numbers is not nearly as bad as Leviticus. I realize all books of the Bible are important each in their own way, but Leviticus drones on about how the preists should dress and sacrifice animals. This may be intresting to some people, but not me. Any way the point is my Wife and I are at least reading the Bible, it is nice. It is something constructive we force ourselves to do together everyday. Plus I have never read the Bible cover to cover before.

I attend Avon Wesleyan Church. It is a very nice switch from what I grew up with. To tell you the truth I guess I never even realized it until I got out of my childhood. See my parents, being the loving head of the family, decided that it would be best if my brother and I attend a Christian School. Looking blindly back this is a VERY wise decsion, after living it, I was glad they let me attend Public School for the last 4 years of high school. Let me just recap, this was not a bad choice for my parents, they were looking out for my better intrest. They tried very hard to raise me with a good Christian education so that they could raise me in a fasion that was easer for their parents to do when they were children. My parents made ALOT of sacrifices so that we could attend a private school, they were not rich, they were not born with a trust fund, there was no magical money that could have been withdrawn from a mythical account so that our tuition was paid for.

I began my private school venture at Warsaw Christian School. These people I feel were and are nice people, just theologicaly misled. When you are in the age from K-4 grades you tend not to remember when you are my age but there are vague memories that I mull over every now and then. This particular Church is a body that believes in speaking in tounges. For those of you who have expirienced this type of church you know how uncomfortable one can become in a short period of time. I believe that there are those with a divine gift of being able to speak in tounges, but it doesnt only happen between 9-12 on Sunday mornings. It is a divine gift given by God to those who are filled with the holy spirit in order to glorify God, not the church body or ones self. Now that I have given my opinion, we had a teacher make us stand around in a circle until we all spoke in tounges. Now look back a couple of sentences, yes I only attended from K-4. I was a CHILD!

11When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child.
(I Corinthinians 13:11)

I did not understand what I was doing! So to satisfy the teachers request I "spoke in tounges"! I will admitt I had no idea what I was saying, because it was GIBBERISH!

So not related entirely to this, my parents decided to send me to Pavilion Baptist School. Baptist was the closest style that they could get to their own church. The church we attended was small. With small being a very relative term in the size of churchs let me elaborate. The current body of Burk Hill Bible Church is less than 10 on a regular basis. Like I said it was a small church. It is very conservative in style, quite close to being Baptist with out the title. Pavilion Baptist School from the surface was an excellant choice for your children if you wanted to raise your kids that way. Unfortunatly I didn't get to see just the surface, I was submersed deep into it. It was fine and all the first couple of years just strict, and isolated from my freinds. I think probably that was my biggest problem with PBS, complete lack of socalization. Pavilion is about 15 miles from Warsaw and all of the other students were from areas beyond that, which as you know 15 miles is like a continent for children. It was also a very small school I had the largest class in the entire school with a class of like12 or 15. The rebellion of my adolescence led me to fail 7th grade. Anyone who had failed a grade knows how traumatizing this is. I went from socialy inept to almost completly withdrawn. My parents worried. I would come home and scream at them for no good reason then leave, and because I had nowhere to go, no friends to turn to I roamed the streets of my village for hours, only to return home and go directly to my room.

The social aspects of the school were a huge part of the problem but there were also Theological disagreements that I was getting old enough to see. The things that I saw the most was the complete hypocrasy of all of the church body and teachers (not all I supose). They would gossip continualy to the point where people would be afraid to miss a service for fear of someone gossiping about them. The gossip was so bad that it would spill from church to school and school to church to the point where the church was always involved in school matters that they didnot belong in. By then end of 8th grade I convinced my parents that I needed to leave.

So, I was off to public school. I was so nervious the first day that I had developed diaherra. School became surprisingly different. There were extracurricular activities, I could choose from course studies, I could have a conversation with a teacher. This did not mean that school did not still suck, it was no longer this unbearible part of my life, I could manage. I played Soccer. My mother had made sure that I was signed up for summer soccer for about 5 years preceeding this, but this, this was real competition. I think my parents were even happier with me.

Seems to be enough for today later all.

Test Audio Post

this is an audio post - click to play

Thursday, March 17, 2005

this is a blog

Ok so I am not quite the comedian I thought, or am the intuitive person, or articulate; I am just the same boring me. Currently I am a regional operations manager for a company that manages medical waste.
Think You have a crappy office? Let me describe mine. There are no cubicles, there is no dingy room with no windows, just a desk surrounded by a trash processing facility. Not just any kind of trash, plain old municipal waste would be a warm welcome this, Medical waste. You ever smelled poop? How about a three day old turd that has been fermenting in urine. Put your desk in that room, then complain to me about your crappy job.

On the off chance my boss takes some interest in my personal life, the job is not so bad. I get to boss people around and you know other stuff (write my blog while sitting at my desk).

Other than work life is really really good. My wife loves me, has no intention of leaving in spite all of my flaws, my step-daughter still has respect for me (she is young yet), and my daughter still smiles when I get home. I have a house, it is small, but I can make the mortgage payment; I have a big yard, it has no flat area to it, but I have a riding lawn mower.

I was born and raised in Warsaw NY, and if it were not for my wife would still be living there... with my parents. Yes I was one of those losers who lived with his parents till he was 25, but still got married to a beautiful girl (go figure). Over the years people have screwed me over and people have been good to me. For the most part those who screwed me over are no longer part of my life and those who were (and are) good to me remain close to my heart.

So here we are talking about me. My parents are still alive and still married. Been through a lot together too. Maybe that is what keeps people together or maybe it is not having a lot of money or maybe it is their faith in God, or maybe just maybe they kept the vows of their youth. Till death do you part. No one is easy to live with especially us Millens, trust me I live with me every day. I thank God for the women who love us. When mom had her stroke, there was never a doubt in dads mind what to do. Mom still thankfully mentions how he made the 50 mile trek to Rochester almost everyday for the 3 months mom was in the hospital. God has always been good to our family as a whole, even when my brother and I extended it by getting married and having children.

Wow, I have children. Weird for me to so that. For many many years I ALWAYS said " I don't want kids!" Then I met my wife, she had already had a beautiful little girl, and she was sooooo easy. I mean I never did anything special and she loved me! It was the weirdest thing, me hanging out with this woman who had a child. Then without even asking the child loved me! I did nothing to deserve this love so why did she love me? I still cant figure that out but she does and it changed my outlook on life.

I hate cats, I don't have good reason I just hate em. We had a dog for a short time but, he was to much and we had to give him away. In the past I have tried raising an Iguana, it died. So looks like I should stay away from any pets, but I sure with children in the house it will be inevitable.

I like cars, especially classic muscle cars. 68 camero RS/SS is my favorite. I hope to own one some day (is it trashy of me to want a Camero?) I already own a 79 RS Camero, but I am looking to get ride of it. It needs a lot of restoration, and I do not have time or money, being a father comes first.

Well I guess that is all of my rambling for the day today see you later (if anyone reads this).